Quezi

Rusty wicket (photo by Dan Zen - CC-BY)

The Australian cricketers performed rather poorly in the 2010-11 Ashes Series against the English. Bear in mind that England has a population almost three times that of Australia.

Not surprisingly a raft of jokes is now circulating at the expense of the Aussie cricketers. A regular Quezi reader, Probo, has made sure that we are acquainted with these. For some reason, these jokes seem to be almost the same as traditional English Cricket Jokes.

• What is the main function of the Australian coach?
  To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

• What do you call an Australian with a champagne bottle in his hand?
  A waiter.

• Who spends the most time on the crease?
  The woman who irons the Australian team’s cricket whites.

• Why don’t Aussie fielders need travel injections?
  Because they never catch anything.

• What’s the Aussie version of a hat trick?
  Three runs
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  in three balls.

• What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common?
  They spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

• What is the most proficient footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?
  The walk back to the pavilion.

• What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
  The entire Australian innings.
  

• What is the definition of optimism?
  An Aussie batsman putting on sunscreen before going out to bat.

• What’s the difference between and Aussie batsman and a formula 1 car?
  Nothing! If you blink you’ll miss both.

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